


Playing a Fool's Game

by LinneaKou



Category: Iron Man: Armored Adventures
Genre: Gen, Happy Tony Project, Humor, Prank Wars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-01
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-20 08:03:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5998033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LinneaKou/pseuds/LinneaKou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Pepper and Happy notice how down Tony's been lately, they decide the best way to cheer him up is to prank him.</p><p>A lot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Playing a Fool's Game

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Royswordsman (RoySwordsman)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoySwordsman/gifts).



> written for #projecthappystark on tumblr; this takes place early on in the second season - Gene has revealed himself to be the Mandarin and has departed with Howard Stark in tow to find the other Makluan rings, and Tony becomes a little obsessed with upgrading everything. Rhodey has the War Machine armor, and Pepper really wants a suit of her own but has not yet gotten one. Whitney has amnesia and doesn't remember being Madame Masque.
> 
> I hope this made you laugh a little, Pri. :D

Pepper called Rhodey on Sunday night and demanded, before he could even speak, "Is Tony coming to school tomorrow?"

There was a moment of silence and then Rhodey groaned. "Pepper, did you steal someone's phone?"

"Don't be silly, I just borrowed my dad's!"

"And why did you do that?"

"Because you wouldn't pick up or answer any of my texts!"

More silence, and then a tired sigh.

"So anyway," Pepper went on, ignoring the pathetic whining noises from the other end. "Make sure Tony is at school tomorrow; he's already missed, like, a ton of class! Good thing he's a genius or else he'd be failing, like, everything! And I _know_ he isn't working on my suit--"

"Pepper!" Rhodey cut in, sounding exasperated. "I get it. My mom got a call from the vice principal about all the classes he's skipped. She's making him go this week. It's just up to this city's ridiculous amount of villains to not be stupid enough to attack while class is happening, all right?"

 "All right! Geez! You don't have to be so pissy!"

"Yes! I do!" Rhodey yelled, and then Pepper heard the dial tone as he hung up.

Pepper blinked and pulled her dad's phone away from her ear to frown at it. "How rude," she muttered, tossing the phone onto her desk. Then she giggled and swiveled around in her chair to face Happy, who was sitting upside-down in her beanbag chair, reading a comic. "Looks like Tony's going to school tomorrow!"

Happy didn't answer, and Pepper grabbed her own cell phone and lobbed it at him.

He jerked as the phone bounced off of his forehead and clattered to the ground. "Wha? What?"

"It's on!" Pepper yelled at him, secretly relieved that he hadn't heard her complaining about her suit.

Happy dropped the comic, which fell to cover his face. Despite this, he flashed the "hang loose" gesture. " _Whoo!_ Prank war!" he yelled, slightly muffled.

"Operation 'Cheer Up Tony Stark' is officially a go!" Pepper cheered, then flinched when her dad pushed her bedroom door open and crossed his arms.

A staring contest commenced, and Happy pulled the comic off of his face to blink up at them.

"My phone, Patricia," her dad said in a flat tone.

Pepper sheepishly handed it to him, and he did the "I'm watching you" gesture at both her and Happy while backing out through the doorway, leaving the door open.

"We're just planning a harmless prank war, Dad!"

"If I get a single call from the principal, you're grounded for a month!" he yelled back from down the hall.

Pepper and Happy exchanged mischievous looks, and she reached into her top desk drawer and pulled out a bag from the nearby craft store. "Let's get sparkly."

 

Tony's return to the Tomorrow Academy was the opposite of triumphant. In fact, he was pretty sure that if he wasn't in such a bad mood, he'd call his behavior "sulking".

Rhonda had commented on his moodiness while forcing him to eat a well-rounded breakfast, and he hadn't reacted particularly well. He felt bad for snapping at Mrs. Rhodes, but the stress and pile-up of just utter bullshit of the past few months was wearing on him like the tide wearing away a beach. Rhodey was shooting little looks at him, like he was expecting an explosion.

Honestly, Tony wasn't even sure he could tamp down on his temper. He was tired, he was frustrated, and there was so much he didn't know about the Mandarin and the rings and...

 _Goddammit_.

Rhodey startled when Tony suddenly slammed a fist into his locker door.

"Dude," Rhodey muttered. "You need to chill out."

Tony contented himself with grumbling as he fiddled with his lock and pulling it open, until--

_poof_

Tony yelped as something in his locker  _exploded_ , raining powder onto his face. He scrambled backwards, knocking into people passing by in the hall, spitting whatever it was out of his mouth and scrubbing it out of his eyes.

"Oh god, oh god, what is it?!" he yelled.

Rhodey had rushed to his aid almost instantly, but suddenly burst out into laughter.

"Rhodey!" Tony continued to wipe at his face, wishing he still had his armor case in his hands. "Help me! I think someone's out to get me!"

"Yeah, Jo-Ann from Jo-Ann Fabrics!" Rhodey wheezed.

Tony finally got his eyes open and stared, incredulously, as Rhodey scooped some of the powder into his palm and blew it at Tony like fairy dust.

Glitter. It was  _fucking glitter_. Pink, sparkly, and tiny flecks of glitter.

Tony gaped at the utter desecration of his sparse locker, which he'd tricked out with his own tech that was now covered in  _sparkles_. And there were  _sparkles_ all down his front, sticking to his shirt and jeans, and in his hair, and up his nose.

"Who glitterbombed me?" he finally sputtered.

Rhodey didn't answer, as he was still too busy laughing his ass off to even stand up right.

Tony looked helplessly at the utter sparkly mess in front of his locker, and then around at the onlookers who were also laughing, and fought the urge to just fuck it and armor up to fly off into the distance.

Little did he know, things could get worse.

 

Changing for P.E. was the next strike.

Rhodey turned at the sound of Tony's indignant shout and once again crumbled into helpless snorts when he caught sight of Tony, having struggled into his gym shirt.

Which was now two sizes too small and strained over his chest.

"Oh. My. God!" a familiar voice rang out as Happy rounded the corner of gym lockers, grinning hugely and his face red with mirth. "Dude, have you been bulking up?"

"This is  _not_ funny!" Tony snapped.

"Put the shorts on," Rhodey said.

" _No!_ "

"Dude, you should totally put the shorts on," Happy agreed, his giggles going high-pitched.

" ** _No!_** " Tony tried to peel it off but he somehow managed to get tangled up in the arm and neck holes.

"I need to commit this to video," Rhodey chortled, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

"You take video of this and your ass is grass," Tony snarled.

Rhodey grinned as he aimed the camera lens at Tony. "Somehow, you don't scare me enough to stop."

 

Halfway through lunch hour, Tony woke up on the roof after dozing off. Somehow, his exhaustion caught up with him and that combined with the warm haze of the mid-spring sunlight put him right to sleep.

He groaned and sat up, checking his phone to make sure he hadn't slept through his next class. Then he frowned and hit the power button, putting the phone to sleep so he could see his reflection.

"What the hell?!" he demanded, turning his face so he could examine the awful handlebar mustache that had been drawn onto his face with marker. "What--"

He froze when the sound of Whitney's laughter rang out over the rooftop.

"You know, I do not think it suits you," she said, her blonde hair flapping in the wind. "Maybe a nice sharp goatee?"

"Oh my GOD," Tony almost screamed, his voice echoing off of the nearby buildings. "Who the  _hell_ is doing this?!"

"Well it's not my dad," Whitney giggled. "He's not this petty." She sat down next to him and offered him a wet wipe. "Here, look at me."

Tony glowered as she attempted to scrub the magic marker off of his face. "I do  _not_ need this right now."

"Well, I did see Pepper Potts and Happy Hogan scurrying down the stairs before I got up here."

Tony stared at her. "Seriously?"

"They were giggling like schoolgirls."

Tony groaned and closed his eyes. "Well, at least it isn't an actual enemy doing all of this."

Whitney hummed absently, rubbing at his cheek. "Lucky you."

 

"Wait, wait, wait...  _Pepper_ 's the one doing all of this?" Rhodey actually stopped in the passageway to the new armory, and actually facepalmed. "She called me last night."

Tony blinked at his best friend. "What?"

"She called me. To make sure that you'd be at school today." Rhodey looked at him, ashamed. "Man, I'm so sorry, I know today was rough on you and I didn't help any--"

"I'm not mad at you, Rhodey. You're just now my favorite, and that means War Machine is getting an upgrade." Tony grinned and pushed the door to the armory open.

There was a plastic clacking noise, and then a  _THUD_.

Tony froze as a bucket filled with lukewarm water came tumbling down, completely soaking his upper body and clattered to the floor.

"Gotcha!" Pepper shrieked from inside the armory as Tony stiffly pushed the door the rest of the way open. "Oh my GOD you do not want to know how hard it was to get that positioned just right without spilling any water! You should see your FACE!!"

"Pepper!" Rhodey yelled, still in the passageway. "Seriously?"

Tony gingerly made his way into the armory proper, already kind of chilly, and glared at Pepper. "Not. Appreciated."

"Aw, come on!" Pepper whined. "All of this was to cheer you up!"

"And you thought pranking me would make me happy?!" Tony demanded.

"Aw, c'mon! The gym clothes thing was funny!"

"That was kinda funny. And the glitterbomb thing," Rhodey admitted.

Tony turned his glare on Rhodey. "You are no longer my favorite."

"What? Then who's your favorite?"

"The AI I'm developing, because fuck you both." Tony stripped off his soaking wet t-shirt and tossed it angrily on a nearby desk. "I'm going out to get away from both of you traitors."

"Tony," Pepper wheedled, but he'd already stepped into the basic armor and blasted out of the armory in a huff.

 

"You still not talking to me?" Rhodey asked as Tony stalked into the Rhodes' house later on that night.

Tony glowered at him.

"I take that as a no, so let me give you a peace offering." Rhodey beckoned him over and handed him his phone, where a video was playing.

Tony watched it, eyebrows raised. "What is this?"

"What you need." Rhodey grinned evilly. " _Revenge_."

 

Happy met Pepper a block away from the Tomorrow Academy, still grinning like the cat that got the canary. "Man, we got Stark  _epically_ yesterday!" He held up a hand for a high-five, then blinked in confusion as Pepper didn't oblige. "Pep?"

"Tony's mad at us," she informed him. "I got him with the classic 'bucket-of-water-over-the-door' trick and he stormed off last night."

Happy deflated a little. "Oh." Then he brightened a bit. "He's a cool dude! He'll get over it!"

"Yeah," Pepper sighed. "I hope so."

They climbed the steps to the Academy in pensive silence, and Pepper sighed again. "I just wanted to cheer him up, but I think I made it worse."

"Hey, don't be so hard on yourself," Happy told her, uncharacteristically serious. "You had good intentions."

"Which is what the road to hell is paved with."

"Seriously, Pep, I'm sure Tony's seen a ton of worse shit in his lifetime," Happy reasoned. "This is probably the least of it."

"True."

They rounded the corner to the locker banks where Pepper's locker was housed, passing Rhodey, who waved at them.

"We can apologize to him in homeroom," Happy said. "I'm sure everything will be okay."

Pepper just nodded as she got her locker open--

\--and froze as a very familiar song began to emanate from her locker.

"What the hell?!" she screamed, slamming it shut.

The music stopped, and Happy stared at it.

"Was that the Numa Numa song?"

"I  _hate_ that song," Pepper groused, just a little faint. She gingerly opened the locker door again.

_[Mai-ia-hii! Mai-ia-huu! Mai-ia-ha! Mai-ia-haha! Mai-ia-hii! Mai-ia-huu! Mai-ia-ha! Mai-ia-haha!!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRx5PrAlUdY) _

"OH MY GOD!" Pepper shrieked, slamming her locker shut again. "Make it  _stop!!_ "

Happy was still staring in horror. "Dude, how is it doing that?!" He gently scooted her aside and slowly edged the locker open.

[A very familiar strain of music met their ears.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ)

"NOOOOOO _OOOOOOOOOOO!!_ " Happy yelled as Rick Astley began to sing about never giving you up. He slammed the locker shut, and Pepper immediately opened it again and the music immediately picked up again.

_We're no strangers to looooooove!_

"This is  _horrible_!" Happy yelled as Pepper quickly shut and re-opened her locker over and over again, and the song picked up each time. "Make it  _stop_ , Pep!"

"I don't know how it's happening!!" Pepper screamed back at him. People were starting to stare as they passed by, and a few were singing along to the song, and she was no closer to figuring out how it was happening.

"This is retribution!" Happy moaned, covering his ears. "This is purgatory!"

"I refuse to believe that hell is full of outdated memes, I  _refuse_!!" Pepper continued slamming her locker open and closed, and Rick Astley kept on singing.

 

Tony had his fist shoved into his mouth to keep himself from succumbing to helpless laughter as he held down the pause button on his phone, hooked up to speakers that were turned and pressed up to the wall directly across from Pepper's locker. He was hidden in the classroom on the other side of the wall, and he could hear Pepper and Happy's howls from where he was sitting.

Rhodey snapped his fingers, and Tony pressed  _play_ again to start up the Rick Astley song again. Rhodey was standing in the doorway to the classroom and watching it unfold, gesturing at him whenever Pepper opened and closed the locker. Tony had been in favor of slipping light-activated speakers in Pepper's locker - speakers he would have had to invent and make during the night - but Rhodey had convinced him that the old-fashioned method would be easier and less likely to be figured out; after all, any speaker he'd make would be big enough to be seen.

Rhodey held up his fist, and Tony paused the music again. He heard Pepper shriek " _HOW IS THIS HAPPENING?!_ " and let out a snort.

For once, he was feeling better than he had in weeks. And all it took was winning a good old-fashioned prank war.

And if he needed another laugh, there were whoopie cushions with Pepper and Happy's names on them in third period physics.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as my jerkass neighbor blasted dubstep music hard enough to rattle my walls YET AGAIN; I want to thank tsukinofaerii, defne, and my IRL friends for suggesting retaliation, which ended up as pranks.


End file.
